Week 2 Weigh In

I gained 4 pounds, putting me at 253.  I visited a friend this weekend and did not make very good choices.  But it's water under the bridge baby, and I'll only need one week to get back to where I was and then it's all downhill from there!

-Amber

Week 1 Weigh In

First week's over: six pounds lost!!!  I'm at 249!!!  Now I need to lose an average of 1.8936!!!  Yaaaay!!!

-Amber

49 Weigh Ins and a Christmas Present: Starting Weight

I have sucked recently.  Various things.  Going into them would not be productive.  No more!

As of Sunday, there are exactly 48 weeks until Chrismas.  I'm going to give myself the Christmas present of being at goal by that time.  Goal is 160.  Weigh In #1 on Sunday was 255.  That means that I'll need to average just under 2 pounds per week.  1.9792 to be exact.  Prepare for daily posts from now on.  Blogger is now my homepage.  Let's get it done!

-Amber

My Bad X 1,000

I've sucked recently.  I thought I learned something new but it got clouded/covered/obliterated by my recent suckitude.  School started and it's my last semester and I'm having a low-self-esteem spasm.  I'm pretty much freaking out.  When I've graduated, I'll officially be an adult.  I'll have to get a job and prove to my superiors and peers every day that I'm worth something/anything at all/enough for them not to fire and laugh at me.  Freaking.  Out.  I'm terrified.  I feel totally worthless, so how am I going to lose weight and get another 4.0 and get a job and keep it?  Those are things normal people do.  People who aren't inherently shitty in numerous ways. 

This has been complete verbal diarrhea.  It's how I feel, I know it makes no sense (except the part of me that believes it).  Bleahch.  Needless to say, I haven't done well on the losing weight front.  I'm gonna make myself post something every day and see if that doesn't guilt-slap me into changing my sad, sad tune. 

Speaking of, "Sad Songs Say So Much" by Elton John came on the radio as I was typing that last paragraph.  I actually feel a tiny bit better singing with it. :-)  I guess even in my lowest moments, music can make me smile.  I may be a dork.  Oh well. :-)

-Amber

Alive And Kicking

I wanted to name this post "alive and nearly kicking" or "alive and getting ready to start kicking" but then I
realized how lame those are.  Firstly, it's bad enough to name a blog after a stupid catchphrase and those were lame, you know, language-wise.  Secondly, why almost?  It's lame of me to be all wishy-washy like that.  Why did I want to think of today as a ramp day where I slowly get back into the swing of things?  I want to lose the weight, and the massacre is over, I should be totally ready to go go go!  So now I am, thanks to seeing my own lameness.  Yay, lame-o-vision!

I'm sure tomorrow's weigh in will be terrible.  I'll probably have to start all over.  It's gonna be sad, but I can handle it.  I've learned something during the massacre, which I will share tomorrow. 

-Amber

Alive But Not Kicking

Hey guys.  Lots to tell.  Don't want to tell it, so I'm telling you that there's something to tell so I'll have to come back and finish the job later and stop avoiding this blog.  Bad me!  I know.  I'll come back prolly on Wednesday, when the impending massacre is over. 

-Amber

Day Six Of The Lipocide Experiment

Today I tried to work on form and mental can-do.  There are several moves that I previously didn't really try because they looked way too hard, and others that I tried but couldn't do for more than a second so I'd always just replace the move with another that was still working the same muscle or whatever.  This time I made myself do what they were doing.  I had to complete the move twice, and then I could do the beginner's version or do it slower, but I had to keep doing that, I couldn't just jog in a circle when things got rough. 

Two interesting things happened.  First, I noticed that my heart rate and fatigue levels were a lot steadier this time.  It's almost like (gasp!) the trainers knew what they were doing when they ordered the moves in that way.  Shocking!  Second, due to thing 1 and (I'm guessing) the fact that I took a break yesterday I DID ALL OF THEM WITHOUT STOPPING!  No big, halfway-through break!  AWESOME!!!!!!

Now I'll see if I can do that two days in a row!

-Amber